tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8702081301018362617.post8788573274888621423..comments2023-03-23T17:01:21.979+02:00Comments on stumbling ani: Daddy Bluesanitabhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07650344510891276730noreply@blogger.comBlogger2125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8702081301018362617.post-32270192874299734812012-07-17T08:48:27.746+02:002012-07-17T08:48:27.746+02:00Thanks Cath. Sometimes it helps to spit out the ho...Thanks Cath. Sometimes it helps to spit out the horrible thoughts in your head so they can stop running around and making me crazy. I cant be more eloquent than "i'm sad/mad/ok". But I will be ok. xanitabhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07650344510891276730noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8702081301018362617.post-70462356267185739312012-07-17T08:28:48.172+02:002012-07-17T08:28:48.172+02:00Death is a relief, and there is no shame in being ...Death is a relief, and there is no shame in being relieved that pain and a limbo-state has ended. <br /><br />You have nothing to apologise for, and every good to be thankful for. The stuff you mentioned - the worry over wasted time, the emotional unendedness...that would exist, no matter what your relationship was. <br /><br />But I'll tell you this for free - he was your dad, you are his daughter. Nothing, not time, death, taxes or storms can change that. That's all you need to remember.<br /><br />It is a lame cliche, for sure, but focus on the times where you smiled at each other. Those are the memories to hold on to. The rest is immaterial. I promise.<br /><br />I didn't speak to my dad for four years, between the ages of 15 and 19. I would speak to him through my mom, and for many years - from when we knew he was ill right up until about a year ago - I berated myself for it. I wished and wondered what kind of wisdom I had missed out on. <br /><br />But, Ani. Berating ourselves serves nobody, least of all you or your mom. And it is you two who must carry on. So, carry on. Xc@thhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16832950336505135574noreply@blogger.com