Friends through the ages

I've always had a difficult time defining what a real friend is.

It's very easy to make friends as a kid. You both like My Little Pony and Take That (oh, dont judge me :P), you tell each other secrets and you share your lunch at school. I miss primary school.

 

And then high school happens. As friends, you bond over people you hate (the blonde "Debbie's") and music that you love (Nirvana & Pearl Jam). You try to fit in and then you try to be independent. You're a kid, trying to be an adult. For the first time, you fight and stand up for yourself. The other girls gossip, some people take sides, and sometimes friends break up. High school girls are mean.

Once all that drama is over, hopefully you're able to go out into the world and find out who you are. You can develop your own tastes in music, without looking at what's cool (I like the Parlotones, OK?!).  You can choose who you want to spend your time with. You dont have to try to "fit in" or hang around people you dont really like. But do you? 

I've found that most people "in the real world" still act very much like high school. They hang out with people that are "cool" and are so afraid to be themselves lest they get kicked out of the group. I've always loved the online world because I can choose my circle of friends with one click of a button. I've realised that other people cant be that "ruthless" and will hold onto "friends" for all sorts of reasons other than real friendship. 

As much time as I spend online, I know very clearly who my real friends are. I pay no attention to the numbers game on the various social networks because I can count on my hands the number of people that I really trust and love. Included in that number are people that I've never met on the other side of the world and some that I haven't spoken to in months. All the people I've encountered have had some impact on my life and I treasure them for it.

 

In the real world, it's much more difficult to meet new people. I've relied on Twitter for my social network and it's been fun for a while. But, right now, I need to have more quality than quantity. I understand that it takes a lot more time and effort and I understand that. I'm not an easy person to get to know but if you want to know me, just ask.  I'm feeling just a little jaded by some bad things that have happened, but I'll try not to bite.

So this is my new criteria for friendship: You dont need to like the same music I like. You don't need to share your lunch or even hate the people I hate. All you really need to do is learn to understand and know me, be honest with me at all times and make me laugh. Ok, and you can also buy me a drink once in a while. ;)

*edit: miss you alice. xx
(and boni and sollune and dsc)

Jy is cooler as ekke

[reference: Jack Parow. This post is for South Africans only as I speak in Afrikaans.]

Ja. Jy is.
I've just never ever been cool.
Well, there was that brief moment in time when my youngest cousin thought I was awesomer than awesome.
Although back then, we didn't use the word awesome. I think I was kiff. Ja. Net so.
But she was young and impressionable... so... I dont think that counts.

About the only thing that made me cool was that I was, like.. so grunge, man.
I wore black all the time. Even had black nail polish AND lipstick. Hardcore, bitches. *giggle*
I even went vegetarian for a bit (that's pretty damn hardcore for a porra, ok?).
And I knew everything... about everything. Ah, to be sixteen again... ;)

Other than that, I was never cool at school.
To everyone else, I was a chubby boffin nerd and, worst of all, a "good girl".
Yep, I didn't smoke, drink or have sex when I was in high school.
No drugs either. I just watched. Yes, really.
I always did what I was told.
Mother said: Do whatever your teacher tells you to do. And I did.
I did all my homework, passed all my tests... was a good little girl. Always.
You can see how this was an epic disaster waiting to happen, right?

Anyway, even with all the smarts, I'm not geeky enough to qualify for geek cool.
I know a lot of geeky stuff... mainly because I spend a lot of time online.
I know about lolcats and internet memes and how to tweet and blog.
I know that the cake is a lie , Cthulhu is lord and master of all and the Flying Spaghetti Monster saves.
But I still love M$. I'm sorry.. but I do.
And although I now have Ubuntu on my laptop, I still pronounce Linux wrong (Lie-nux instead of Lih-nux).
It sucks. I'm geeky enough to be an online addict but not geeky enough to roll with the real geeks. I should really learn computers...

Other than that, I've always lived in da norf. Ja, beyond the boerewors curtain.
And, like, not even in the cool part of da norf. That would be D'ville, you Southern Suburb Snobs. Meh.
I've lived in Woodstock, Maitland (the horrors), Goodwood (shut it), Bellville (SUID!) and Parow. Ja. Fokken Peh-row. I KNOW, ok?!
Anyway, it's fine. At least I keep it real. Actually, no... I just feel like I dont belong anywhere. Very frustrating.

What else makes me not cool?
Well.. I LURVE silly crap.. like Hello Kitty... and My Little Pony... and butterflies. So gay. :P
Talking about gay... I should really be a gay man. I'd kick ass. (Oh, stop giggling.)
Music: 70's and 80's trash, Madonna, George Michael, ABBA. Yep, I have no shame.
I watch Oprah... and Dr Phil. If I could, I'd watch E-Entertainment channel all day.
I drive a Tazz.
I don't wear jeans.
I'm unemployed.
I think Die Antwoord is stupid.
I like the Parlotones.
I've answered a personal ad.
I can't tweet on my phone!

Argh... This is so liberating.
Now you know some of my secret shame.
I dont think I'll ever be cool... and that's really ok.
I'm pretty happy with my quirks.
Anyway.. don't panic. And don't unfriend me! :P
I do have some standards.
At least I don't own Crocs.
*chuckles to herself*