I have some issues. Letting go is one of them.
This weekend, I was cut off from technology. This isn't the first time it's happened but every time it happens, I do panic a little and realise how much I rely on that virtual connection.
I realise how tightly I hold onto things and people... and stuff. So much STUFF!
I've become better and better at letting go. After my separation and divorce, I have learned to let go of all the stuff I accumulated over those five years. Yes, I still wish I had my cups and plates and duvet sets I carefully picked out for our home... but I can live without them.
Next weekend I need to chuck my ex husband out of my house and I'm a little scared/worried about all that stuff just being tossed aside. I shouldn't... but I do. I want it to mean something.... I hate feeling like it was all for nothing and now I have nothing.
However, the stuff is easier to let go of than people. It's been difficult, but I have let go of a few people that made me feel less than awesome. I dont need any cheerleaders but I would like friends that think I am the bee's knees. I dont really have that right now... and it bothers me a bit. But I have to believe that getting rid of the old will help bring in some new blood, so to speak.
I've also been shown how tightly I hold onto what I want.. and forget that sometimes I should let go of "want" and accept "this is what you need." How very buddhist. :P And sometimes it's more about "this is what you need to learn." It's a bit painful.... but I think I'm getting it.
I dont know if this will make sense to anyone... but I feel like something is changing.
I need to learn important lessons about love and life.... and I love how the people around me at the moment are challenging some of my old beliefs around that.
I'm a little excited.
I love the way my heart is a little bit more open than it used to be.
By letting go of the crap, you can let a whole lot of love in.
Wednesday, February 8, 2012
Tuesday, February 7, 2012
The shoes hurt her feet but she carried on walking with her friend up a mountain.
She made it all the way to the top and spent some magical moments in rock pools with the friend.
On the way back, she had to stop because her feet were hurting so bad.
The very kind friend (a boy) offered the girl his shoes and he would wear hers.
The girl protested but, after a few more painful steps, she tried on his shoes.
They fit and they both walked off together down the mountain.
The boy soon removed his shoes and walked barefoot instead.
The boy hurt his feet on the rocky mountain.... but never once complained.
The girl... was very grateful....and was in awe of his kindness and generosity.
She was also, despite all her protests, fallling into serious "like" all over again with the boy.
This could be trouble.
But she didn't care.