Wednesday, November 7, 2012

Brave thing

So I think I did a brave thing on Monday... I asked for help.

At first, it was just a little tweet sent out early on Monday morning.
You know how you sometimes just send out tweets without thinking... kinda hoping that no one sees but you just have to spit it out? Yeah, well... I really didnt expect anyone to see this tweet:
"Maybe I need help #depression"
People saw.
And people helped.
Thank you people. :)

So I did the next logical thing and found a doc and saw him the same day. It was good. I was given permission to grieve the many losses I have experienced in the last year. And some that I thought I was already over. Our brains are funny things. Regardless, I am giving myself a break and going to really take care of myself. Really. Kinda. Maybe.

The first step is getting some proper sleep and dreaming again. He is interested in dreams and working with the unconscious which makes my hippy heart very happy. And he doesn't like using medication which also makes me happy because I really dont do zombie very well. Oh and he's kinda cute. So that helps.

Otherwise, I'm still doing stupid shit... wasting money... worrying about everyone else too much.
I miss my friend Yvette. I really do. I've been sick.. and mentally down for a while now so I've chosen to stay away because she needs happy vibes and I aint got much of those these days.
I worry about my mom.. I think she is also depressed but... I dont know how to help her.
I worry about work... it's complicated.

And I've decided... to blog more.
So.... hi.
And um... bye for now.

xx
~anib

6 comments:

  1. You're a for amazing. I'm so glad that you were brave and went to go see someone. Suffering doesn't make us better people, it just makes us miserable.

    *all the hugs*

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    1. thanks hun. i couldn't be brave on my own. *hugs*

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  2. I'm glad you reached out to people for help and to a doctor which will help you for sure. I'm glad that you are happy with the doc you're seeing.

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  3. *hugs*

    I miss you too sweets but getting healthy (bod, mind and soul) is what we both are trying to do right now. So proud you've gone to see someone. Mine keeps telling me I need to stop being strong for everyone else and just be strong for myself. Not the same but perhaps similar?

    *hugs*

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    1. yeah. it's a constant work in progress. i'm trying to talk more and maybe not carry the entire world's problems on my shoulders. and get rid of the low lying fruits! argh :)

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